Author: Amy Edwards

All About Adultery in North Carolina (Part 2 of 2)

Posted on

Duty of Third Party to Warn Spouse of STD

If a husband or wife passes a sexually transmitted disease (STD) to the other spouse as a result of his or her adultery, the innocent spouse may with a civil suit for financial damages against the man or woman who passed the STD to the husband or wife. To successfully prove a claim for negligent infliction of an STD, the victim spouse must prove the source of the STD, and that the infected person knew or should have known he or she was infected with venereal disease. Because it is foreseeable that the two spouses would have intercourse, the infected person has a legal duty to abstain from sexual contact, or at least a legal duty to warn the innocent spouse.

Criminal Conversation

The term criminal conversation (CC) is somewhat misleading. Although it sounds like a crime, it is not. Instead, CC is a civil lawsuit for money damages. A married person may file a claim for CC against the third-party who had sexual intercourse with his or her spouse. CC holds that third-party financially accountable to the husband or wife for interference with his or her marital conjugal relationship, which is protected by law. Although the unfaithful spouse is not on the hook for financial damages, he or she generally testifies in a jury trial about the acts that took place. Alienation of affections is a completely different lawsuit that addresses alienating or stealing the spouse, regardless of whether there was sexual intercourse. CC is exclusively based on sexual intercourse.

Divorce from Bed and Board

North Carolina recognizes a fault-based claim called divorce from bed and board (DBB), and one of the grounds for it is adultery. A decree for a DBB does not a “divorce” the husband and wife allowing them to remarry. It is a court decree that declares the spouses to be officially separated. This keeps a spouse from committing abandonment if he or she wants to separate. Instead, if a spouse successfully obtains a DBB, the spouse who committed adultery loses spousal rights to certain inheritance rights, including intestate succession, which is the right to inherit if the other spouse dies without a will. Also lost is the right to take an “elective share” of the deceased spouse’s estate if the deceased spouse tried to “disinherit” him or her, as well as the right to administer that spouse’s estate as an executor or executrix.

Criminal Law

Although it is almost certainly unconstitutional, one criminal statute that is still on the books makes voluntary adultery a crime. NC Gen. Stat. §14-184 is captioned Fornication and Adultery. The statute makes it a Class 2 misdemeanor “[i]f any man and woman, not being married to each other, shall lewdly and lasciviously associate, bed and cohabit together . . .” In cases for alienation of affections and criminal conversation, parties frequently used this criminal law to protect themselves from testifying. Because adultery was a crime, a person who was sued for it could plead the Fifth Amendment to avoid incriminating himself or herself. Doing so in a civil case allows the judge or jury to assume the person did commit adultery.

All About Adultery in North Carolina (Part 1 of 2)

Posted on

Merriam Webster defines adulterate as a verb, an act “to corrupt, debase, or make impure by the addition of a foreign or inferior substance or element.” North Carolina alimony laws don’t call it adultery. Instead, adultery as used in alimony cases is a form of marital misconduct called “illicit sexual behavior.” The definition is “acts of sexual or deviate sexual intercourse, deviate sexual acts, or sexual acts defined in NC Gen. Stat. §14-27.20(4), voluntarily engaged in by a spouse with someone other than the other spouse.” NC Gen. Stat. §50-16.3A. People have argued about which acts between the spouse and third-party meet the definition of illicit sexual behavior. In 2011, a wife unsuccessfully argued that her behavior didn’t meet the standard of illicit sexual behavior because the man she had been with wasn’t able to complete the act they had started but were unable to finish. Romulus v. Romulus (2011). The Romulus case gives an exhaustive list of definitions (starting on page 47) of various acts.

Adultery and Alimony

In North Carolina, divorce is a “no fault” process based on a full year of separation between a husband and wife. However, we strongly cling to fault in our alimony laws. For many reasons, alimony can be awarded based only on finances, meaning incomes and reasonable living expenses. But if the supporting spouse commits adultery, he or she automatically has to pay alimony. The reverse is also true. The dependent spouse automatically loses alimony if he or she cheats. Other types of marital fault are only factors the judge must consider, and they don’t demand a particular result as adultery does. If both spouses have cheated, the judge then denies or awards alimony in his or her discretion “after consideration of all of the circumstances.” NC Gen. Stat. §50-16.3A.

How Do You Prove Adultery?

Adultery is almost always a circumstantial case. After all, most spouses aren’t advertising their infidelity. It is rarely proven by direct evidence. Therefore, our law resorts to a standard called the “inclination and opportunity doctrine.” Owens v. Owens, 28 NC App 713 (1976). This means the spouse alleging adultery must prove two things. First, was there an opportunity for the spouse and third-party to be together in privacy? Second, if they had the opportunity to be together, were they inclined (likely) to have sex? Like any other disputed fact, witnesses may testify about the opportunity, and/or whether the spouse and third-party were inclined to cheat. Other evidence might include a secret credit card account statement reflecting hotel charges or discovered e-mails/texts between the lovers. Family law cases are bench trials, cases heard by a judge. One of the few exceptions to that rule is marital misconduct, including illicit sexual behavior. A jury can render a verdict on whether the spouse committed marital misconduct. NC Gen. Stat. §50-16.3A.

Uh Oh . . . Did You Condone It?

One defense to alimony is condonation. As the name suggests, it means all is forgiven . . . and it gives a bit of a clean slate to the cheating spouse. If the innocent spouse discovers an affair and continues to stay in the marriage, the law gives the cheating spouse a second chance. After the second chance is given, if the parties separate for some other reason later, the court may consider the affair in deciding how long alimony should be paid and in what amount. In other words, someone doesn’t automatically win or lose an alimony case because of the affair. How does the law define “staying in the marriage” and condoning the cheater? In short, the court assumes condonation has occurred if the spouses voluntarily have intercourse after knowing about the affair. Malloy v. Malloy, 33 NC App. 56 (1977). One side effect of condonation is that the spouse who would’ve automatically won the alimony case is essentially punished for trying to make the marriage work.

Marital Fault

Posted on

Although the role of marital fault has been narrowed a great deal over recent years, it is still quite alive and kicking. Fault is not a factor in the divorce itself, but it does come into play with other claims that are filed with the divorce. NC acts of marital fault are listed by statute, as well as case law, decided by the North Carolina Court of Appeals.

Adultery

The deal-breaker in cases that consider marital fault is adultery but under certain exceptions, the spouse who commits fault may be given a clean slate so to speak. There are random defenses to these fault claims, but they are beyond the scope of this article. Based on my observations over the years, adultery is by far the most litigated fault ground. It is designated by statute as “illicit sexual behavior” and it “means acts of sexual or deviate sexual intercourse, deviate sexual acts, or sexual acts defined in [rape laws], voluntarily engaged in by a spouse with someone other than the other spouse.” Adultery is rarely proven by a “smoking gun” complete with photos or videos, as we see on television. In real life, adultery is proven with different types of evidence, including testimony of witnesses. Alimony may be proven with a collection of evidence, taken as a whole, not just one item of evidence.

Other Acts of Marital Fault

Other acts of marital fault include maliciously turning the other spouse outdoors, and treating him or her cruelly or barbarously endangering his or her life. Also considered marital fault is a spouse being an “excessive user of alcohol or drugs” when it makes the other person’s life intolerable. Closely related to that ground is another bad behavior: “involuntary separation of the spouses in consequence of a criminal act committed.” In other words, this refers to a spouse who is incarcerated. Although the law includes “reckless spending of the income of either party, or the destruction, waste, diversion, or concealment of assets,” as marital fault, it can be difficult to show the other person’s intent as it relates to their money management.

Indignities

Marital fault includes “other such indignities to the person of the other as to render his or her condition intolerable and life burdensome.” This quaintly worded bad behavior requires more than a single time or two, which the law deems a “course of conduct.” Our courts do not tell us exactly which bad behavior is included under this definition, preferring instead to consider it on a case by case basis. Many behaviors may qualify as marital fault. One North Carolina case says behavior included in the term “indignities” includes “unmerited reproach, studied neglect, abusive language, and other manifestations of settled hate and estrangement.” However, indignities can consist of willful failure to provide necessary subsistence according to one’s means and condition. Like the reckless spending fault, this one may be difficult to unravel because people manage their finances in many different ways.

Abandonment

In short, abandonment is a marital fault consisting of one spouse leaving the other spouse without justification. One creative attorney just made up a new fault ground in 1987, and named it “constructive” abandonment. It stuck, and the NC Court of Appeals has recognized it as marital fault. Any time the law needs to prevent some injustice from happening, it may choose to essentially pretend a certain thing exists, and they say it is “constructive.” As used here, constructive abandonment means that even if the spouses are both at home and no one physically abandoned the home, the court may choose to treat a spouse as abandoning the home anyway if the behavior was bad enough.

See: NC Gen. Stat. 52-B, NC Gen Stat. 50-7, NC Gen Stat. 50-16.1A, Evans v. Evans, 169 NC App 358 (2005), and Ellinwood v. Ellinwood, 88 N.C. App. 119 (1987)

The Great Treasure Hunt: Hidden Income

Posted on

Child support and alimony cases are based on the incomes of the parties so it is important to leave no stone unturned, even if one of you has no income. North Carolina law usually counts all kinds of compensation as income, although there are some exceptions.

What Are We Looking For?

Income is not defined by salary alone. Especially with large employers or self-employed individuals, there are “hidden” forms of compensation. There are two basic kinds of income in family law. Earned income is based on employment (salaries, wages, commissions, bonuses, dividends, severance pay, etc.) and unearned income includes everything else. Examples of unearned income include ownership or operation of a business, rents received from rental property, retirement or pensions, interest, trusts, annuities, capital gains, certain Social Security benefits, worker’s compensation benefits, unemployment insurance benefits, disability pay and insurance benefits, gifts, prizes and alimony or maintenance received from persons other than the parties to the instant action (from the NC Child Support Guidelines).

The Evidence: Tax Records

Courts first look at tax returns, which hold important clues about income. Most people know the W-2 statements include wages, tips and compensation as shown in box 1, which are taxed. But not everyone realizes box 3 of a W-2 statement reflects the social security wages, including income that isn’t taxed. If the amount of social security wages is larger, it should be used. Why? Because the larger amount includes tax deferred benefits. The most common example is an employee’s choice to make contributions to a 401(k) plan. Otherwise, several thousand dollars of income is easily missed. If someone has a 1099 tax statement, it means there is “miscellaneous income” such as money paid to that person for services as an independent contractor. A 1099-R statement is issued when a person collects retirement from pensions, annuities, retirement or profit-sharing plans, IRAs, insurance contracts, etc. Social security is shown on a SSA-1099 tax statement, which might be missed because sometimes it is taxed, and sometimes not. All of these tax statements, not just the tax returns themselves, indicate income for purposes of child support or alimony.

The Evidence: Pay Statements

While tax returns and tax statements give us a good starting point, they don’t tell the whole story. Certain benefits are disguised because they are voluntarily payroll “deducted” from someone’s pay. However, many of those deductions represent compensation the employee chooses to divert, so they are really income. This is because they are tax-free, tax-exempt or pre-tax benefits, so they won’t appear on the W-2 statement at all. One common example of a pre-tax payroll-deducted benefit is an employee’s payment for health, vision, and/or dental insurance. Those payments are made by the employee from his or her pay but because they are not taxed, they generally won’t be included on the W-2. Tax-exempt benefits include military disability payments and most military allowances, such as BAH and BAS, which usually aren’t even shown on the tax return. This is why it is a good idea to get the final pay statement or other statement that shows all compensation, taxed or not taxed, as of December 31st.

The Evidence: Self-Employment Business Expenses

The scope of this subject is too broad for this article but the general overview involves income disguised as business expenses. If these appear on the tax returns, most of the time they won’t be detailed enough to properly identify them without further investigation. Loans from the business to the business owner can be big-ticket forms of income even though they appear to be debts. Other “business expenses” include fringe benefits like free housing and company-payment of cell phones, health insurance, or credit cards. Some companies pay not only vehicle payments but gas and insurance. Typical travel expenses (or reimbursement of expenses) such as lodging, mileage and food also frequently masquerade as business expenses. While these expenses may be perfectly legitimate for IRS purposes, judges in family court will usually include them as income to the extent it is appropriate under the circumstances. The NC Child Support Guidelines count these benefits as income to the business owner by the company are considered income if they are significant and reduce personal living expenses.

What Do Judges Consider in Alimony Cases?

Posted on

The factors guide judges in reminding them of the most important things. Either spouse may seek alimony if he or she earns less than the other in North Carolina, although there’s no specific dollar amount that determines by how much less. While we have guidelines in child support cases that compute an amount based on incomes and certain child-related expenses, we don’t have anything of that nature for alimony. Each party prepares a budget as a trial exhibit, which includes income and living expenses. If the judge awards it, the amount of alimony and how long it will be paid is discretionary.

Alimony Factors: Incomes/Benefits

NC judges must consider a list of factors in alimony cases. The first factor to consider is how much income each spouse has, and sometimes what a spouse has the capacity to earn. Also considered is unearned income, which is not shown on a W-2 statement, such as dividends, rents, retirement payments, disability, social security payments and employment benefits such as medical insurance (and/or dental and vision insurance), retirement benefits, and marital property and debts.

Alimony Factors: Each Person’s Situation

The court considers each spouse’s individual circumstance, education, age, physical and mental abilities, and emotional conditions. For example, a 25-year-old spouse and a 60-year-old spouse will be treated differently based on medical conditions and the ability to work. Their needs and expectations, such as the anticipated date of retirement or going back to school, also vary. Marital misconduct of either spouse may also be considered.

Alimony Factors: History of the Marriage

The court also looks at the standard of living that the parties established during the marriage. How long the parties were married and the contribution by one spouse to the education, training, or increased earning power of the other spouse are other factors. One party might have kept the home-fires burning for the last ten years, caring for the children while the other devoted his or her energy to obtaining a degree or advance in a profession, improving the family income. In fact, the statute also requires the judge to consider the “extent to which the earning power, expenses, or financial obligations of a spouse will be affected by reason of serving as the custodian of a minor child.”

Alimony Factors: Miscellaneous

The court looks at family obligations, such as paying child support for children with another parent, or alimony to a former spouse. Courts usually have the trial for equitable distribution (the division of marital property and debt) before the alimony trial. This is because the judge will look at who kept which assets, and who is responsible for various marital bills, which is important when determining each party’s reasonable expenses. If someone brought assets into the marriage, the court has the right to consider. The federal, state, and local tax ramifications of the alimony award are legitimate factors for the judge to weigh in making an alimony award.

The factors are meant to guide judges in reminding them of the most important things to think about when deciding what to order in alimony cases. The flexibility is there but just in case, the statute also tells judges that they are free to consider “Any other factor relating to the economic circumstances of the parties that the court finds to be just and proper.” NC Gen. Stat. §50-16.3A.

Have You Reconciled With Your Ex?

Posted on

Besides obtaining a divorce, the date a couple separates can have a significant impact on equitable distribution of marital assets and debts, child support and alimony. When a married couple decides to call it quits, there is some date they separated.  But when is it? The answer is not always as simple as it sounds. There is a myth that people can’t be separated for purposes of divorce until they have something on paper. That is not the case. In North Carolina, if parties stop living together, and at least one intends the separation to be permanent, they are separated. Physically living apart is a requirement, however. Living in the same home in different rooms or out-buildings such as the garage or “man cave” is usually not enough. Despite what was portrayed in the War of the Roses movie when one duct taped a line down one-half of the house, you can’t do it that way here if your goal is to seek a divorce.

The State Policy

From the viewpoint of the public policy behind this one year waiting period, marriages should be fostered and divorce should be discouraged to some extent.  A waiting period gives spouses time to cool off after a major dispute. The courts would no doubt be much busier if there was no waiting period and either party could apply for a divorce on Monday morning after a fight on Friday night. There is debate about whether the year-long waiting period prevents divorces, thereby preserving marriages. The requirement that at least one of the parties intend for the separation to be permanent makes sense when you think about happily married people who are physically separated because of military service or because one of them spends an extended period of time in the hospital, for example.

What If We Try to Work Things Out?

Another question in determining whether you are separated for the purpose of divorce is whether you have made any efforts to reconcile. If a couple reconciles, meaning they return to the husband and wife relationship they had before the separation, they are no longer separated. If they reconcile and later decide to separate again, the one year wait begins from that second date of separation. Years ago, the one year period of separation required to seek a divorce would start over if the parties had intercourse.  Now, the law says that an isolated act of intercourse will not start the clock over again but beyond that, it is not always clear at what point they reconciled or separated. Reconciliation and making efforts to work things out can lead to one of the spouses moving back into the home, which is almost always viewed as reconciling in legal terms. There is no black and white answer on whether the actions of a couple between those two extremes would require the one year waiting period to begin all over again. The court looks at the circumstances of each case when the date of separation is disputed.

Grey Divorce: Issues For Older Spouses

Posted on

Middle-aged and older spouses have the same issues as other couples when they separate and divorce, although they are viewing them from the other direction. They don’t usually have any minor children but they often have substantial assets. People in second or third marriages are more likely to have premarital agreements or “prenups” that dictate what must be done about property and alimony if the couple splits. Another likely scenario of those with silver hair and more than one marriage under their belts is tracing property.  In our state, tracing is used to decide what share of an asset is separate property, and what share, if any, is marital property. This is expensive and time-consuming especially when addressing real estate, investment and retirement accounts. Therefore, this article assumes all assets are marital property and that there is no premarital agreement.

Alimony & Expenses

North Carolina courts must consider the incomes and reasonable expenses of both spouses in alimony cases.  Spouses who are nearing age 65 are facing Medicare and “doughnut hole” insurance instead of private insurance. Medicare could make things better or worse financially when compared with the health, vision and dental insurance offered by a spouse’s employer and whether the employer paid at least part of the premiums. Settlements and court orders for people nearing 65 typically take this into account, changing the amount of support once one or both spouses have Medicare coverage. Older spouses routinely lose loved ones and inherit property. While inheritances are usually considered separate property, assets such as rental property or investments are considered income for purposes of alimony.

Alimony: When Should You Retire?

When alimony is looming, parties may bicker about the reasonable age that the breadwinner or the financially dependent spouse should retire. Although it is extremely rare, I’ve actually had a case in which the judge ruled that the breadwinner couldn’t afford to retire at a certain age.  Of course, he was legally free to retire any time but his alimony was still ordered based on the same income he had from his employment. Judges consider a number of things when deciding if someone should be able to retire for purposes of determining income for an alimony case, including age, health, work history and whether the spouse is genuinely ready to retire or just saying that for court.

Parties might dispute the choice of a retired spouse not to charge adult children for work-related childcare of grandchildren. Spouses can disagree about the timing of a spouse electing to receive Social Security retirement payments, which vary in amount depending on what age the person is. Life insurance becomes more important when dealing with older spouses, particularly if a spouse is depending on alimony that ends if the other spouse dies.  When someone retires, they often lose the term life insurance that is offered by many employers. Another dilemma can arise when the policy was purchased when the insured spouse was young because the cost of buying that protection now would be prohibitively expensive.

Marital Property

Divorcing couples may decide that it makes sense to have one spouse stay in the home and “buyout” the other spouse’s share, which might take less time and involve less risk than trying to sell it.  When there is no mortgage to consider, the cost for that buyout can be too high when there aren’t lots of liquid assets to make up for it. In that event, they will probably end up selling the home and dividing the proceeds, which might raise tax issues if a spouse doesn’t intend to purchase another home with his or her share of the sales proceeds.

Couples who are retired don’t usually have the same opportunity to rebuild financially as those who divorce in their thirties or even forties. So, when pensions or other retirement benefits are the only income besides social security, dividing them equally is a financial hit that can’t easily be absorbed. There are tax penalties for those who take a distribution of money from their retirement before 59.5 years old. On the other hand, when there are IRAs or other accounts that allow owners to choose the dates and amounts of money to withdraw, there might be RMDs (required minimum distributions) of retirement. When spouses have multiple retirement vehicles, some might be taxed differently, such as the Roth IRA versus the traditional IRA. Accordingly, each one has advantages and disadvantages even if they appear to be equal in value. Other benefits might be tax free, such as military disability, which is separate property but counts as income for alimony.

Getting Attorney’s Fees in Family Law Cases

Posted on

In North Carolina family law cases, a party may seek attorney’s fees in court cases involving child custody and support, and for temporary and permanent alimony, among other claims. With a couple of rare and unique exceptions to the rule, attorney’s fees aren’t usually available to be awarded by the court in equitable distribution cases for division of marital assets and debts.

Child Custody and Support Claims

The law permits parents to ask the court to award attorney’s fees in child custody and support cases, including cases when a parent files a motion to modify the order that is already in place. There are three requirements. First, the person asking for fees must be an “interested party” meaning he or she is someone entitled to exercise the legal right to participate in the lawsuit. Second, the person must be acting in good faith, not filing a frivolous claim. The third requirement for the court to address is whether the person “has insufficient means to defray the expense of the suit.” In other words, the person had to turn to the courts to get help, which has created a financial hardship.  If the claim was for child support there is a fourth requirement. The parent who should be paying support “has refused to provide support which is adequate under the circumstances.” If the parent files a frivolous claim, the court is also entitled to award fees to the other parent. NC Gen. Stat. §50-13.5

Alimony and Temporary Alimony

If the court awards alimony or temporary alimony, called postseparation support, the judge has the authority to award attorney’s fees if the financially dependent spouse doesn’t have sufficient means to subsist during the pending case. That means the dependent spouse can’t meet living expenses until the judge enters an order for alimony. As is the case with children’s claims, the court must rule on whether the dependent spouse “has insufficient means to defray the expense of the suit.” These requirements also apply when the dependent spouse files a motion to modify the alimony. NC Gen. Stat. §50-16.4. At the trial, the attorney submits an affidavit about the fees, along with billing statements to show what has been paid. The judge generally confirms the fee is reasonable, considering the attorney’s skills and qualifications, and the type of work the attorney performed. Customarily, the client has to pay the attorney at the beginning of the case. If the fees are awarded, they are either reimbursed to the client or applied to any outstanding balance the client owes to the attorney. As is the case in so many family law cases in North Carolina, the judge has broad discretion when ruling on fees. A judge is free to order some, none or part of the fees requested.

Two’s Company and Three’s a Crowd: Third Parties in Family Law Cases

Posted on

Family law cases can be contentious enough with two people, but when there’s a third-party, it gets even more contentious and complicated. Third parties occur most frequently when marital property is at issue, and when there is a custody battle underway.

Third Party Rights

Once a third-party is named as a party in the lawsuit, he or she is entitled to the same rights as the other named parties in the lawsuit. But in an equitable distribution case, those rights extend only to the asset. Third parties have the right to call witnesses to testify, perform depositions, serve discovery, file motions, present evidence to the court, etc.

Equitable Distribution: Co-owners of Property

Most couples own property either in their joint names together or individually. But sometimes, a couple owns assets with a third-party who is a co-owner (CO). For instance, when a couple purchases a home, the in-laws might co-sign the mortgage note so the couple will qualify for the loan. Since they share legal responsibility for the mortgage debt, the in-laws might then want their names added to the deed. When a spouse files a lawsuit for equitable distribution, the division of marital property, the court makes a ruling on ownership of assets and debts. In that scenario, four people would be COs even though the younger couple would be the only residents living in the home. The law requires COs to be joined as parties to the case so they can protect their ownership interest. If the third-party COs are not included as parties to the lawsuit, the court does not have jurisdiction over that property. In the recent Carpenter v. Carpenter, the NC Court of Appeals vacated a court order because the lower court made a ruling on an investment account without naming the child as a third-party because the child was listed as an owner of the account. In another recent case, Nicks v. Nicks, the same result occurred when there were ownership interests in a business, but the business was not joined as a third-party to the lawsuit.

Child Custody Cases

Both parents have a constitutional right to the care and custody of their children. When it comes to non-parents, third parties have a heavy burden to bear if they ask the court to intervene as a party in a child custody case. The non-parent must show the parents’ constitutional rights should be limited because they are unfit. Or, the non-parent must prove the parents have acted in a manner that is contrary with their parental obligations. In other words, non-parents must show there is a very serious problem with the parents before the court could designate them as third parties because the parents have constitutional rights as parents. If they are granted the right to intervene in the case, they are then give the rights of any other party to the case.

Grandparents

Grandparents face the same hurdles as any other third-party when it comes to child custody cases. They have no special status in a child custody case. However, they do have one special rule. Because they are grandparents, they can in some circumstances be designated as third parties if a custody case is pending so they can ask the court for court-ordered visitation. This generally means the court will set aside time for visits, as opposed to giving them the ability to make parenting decisions or have any type of physical custody, which is really physical “possession” of the child.

The Trial: A Chaotic Experience

Posted on

No matter how prepared you and your attorney are, the days before a trial are frantic and stressful. A good case can be like a work of art. At first glance, it can look flawless but when you stand back and tilt your head, there are always a few more minor adjustments to be made before it is seemingly perfect. But trials are not perfect. Nor are they a color-by-number picture with a beginning and an end brightly mapped out. Instead, trials are organic.

How are Trials Organic?

Trials are organic because they take on lives of their own. After the first hour or two in the courtroom, a rhythm usually develops, which can offer a little more comfort. Trials are never what you (or your attorney) expect. Perhaps they will be better or worse, but they rarely stick to the script. Human nature means life is fluid . . . and messy. Because life doesn’t have a pause button, new events are constantly taking place right up to the day of the trial.

The Human Factor

No two trials are the same, nor are they made up by the same cast of characters or backdrop. Besides the fear of the unknown, the parties have the pressure of court staring them in the face. Stress and tempers can flare between the plaintiff and the defendant. Last-minute blow-ups between the parties and extended family members can impact the direction of the trial too. One or both of the attorneys might be completely unaware of some major problem that just unfolded on the day before court. The script is sometimes scrapped early in the trial because of the unexpected testimony of a witness or two. In that event, your attorney must improvise, playing it by ear.

The Attorney

Approaching trial dates can cause people to reconsider whether they want to attempt settlement. It is common for clients and their attorneys to be in touch with the opposing party all through the late evening on the eve of court. While the attorneys are tending to last minute details of trial preparation, if their clients want to negotiate and settle the case, they might draft the settlement documents at the same time with the hope that their time has been well-spent and that the parties will sign it the next morning. Time is a luxury most attorneys don’t have. We might have two or even three trials back to back, a problem over which we have little if any control. In the meantime, preparing witnesses to testify too early means they’re more likely to forget what they discussed with the attorney, so last-minute calls to witnesses are the norm.

Everyone Else

It is a good idea to have friends and/or family with you in court for moral support. They have the best intentions but sometimes they insert themselves between you and your attorney, interrupting your huddle and distracting us from communicating during a quick 5-minute break. A main pet peeve judges have is the reactions of those in the courtroom. The attorneys are facing the judge at the front of the room, so they can’t see what happens behind them. There is often drama in the courtroom in family law cases. Loved ones sometimes roll their eyes, huff, shake their heads or cause disruption. Judges may stop the trial to tell the audience that such reactions are unacceptable. Further, they may be advised that if there is any further disruption, someone will be held in contempt of court.